Mucha mierda a caso de nada

...OK

So how did that long load of verbal turned into cyber-literal vomit have to do with "Much Ado About Nothing" which is the play I saw even though i keep saying it was "As you Like It"
well...

I guess the final realization, that I had...
and when I say realization, I mean epiphany... I mean gutteral, supereme, passionate, and bit bit by bit all consuming explosion of p-ure truth inside the very core of my internal ethereal structure...
was a little anti-climactic, seeing as it was something a bit obvious, to me at least.

I want to tell stories.
Movies most likely and theatre and the like.
That is what I feel like my life is for.

Which to a certain degree makes me feel pretty useless.
I mean, you know... in the grand scheme of things. In the big picture of human achievement, progress, and divine relations...
Yet, not...
I gave it some thought, and I thought about my life, and the life of some of the people I know... and I thought, how nice is the 3/4 of a teaspoon of sugar that is the universally known collection of ficticious BS that we have in our heads. Some long term, some not...
But, as I sat with Jaqueline and Kraus the other day in teh faculty room, guiltily rewatching the "Dancha" video by the Pussycat Dolls that we fenaigled into the school computers...Jaqueline goes... "Wow, that look is really Lara Croft."

I thought later... how nice is it that soemthing so trivial and insignificant as a non-real oversexualized uberexagerated female action adventure videogame female, is in the public consciousness to the point where me, an oddball monkey from NYC, and JQ, for all intents and purposes, a farmgirl from Iowa... can relate for a few seconds on the mutual recognition of said trivial and insignificant character.

ANd what about those stories that do live in the public forever?

I probably will never create one of them, but i will enjoy my life... and if i do help to bring one of those into the mental real... than so be it, and if i don't... well i lived my life... no?