Free my path of obstacles, dear Lord Ganesha

I have to say I strongly believe that fear is by far the worst of humanity's enemies. What we do out of fear is amazing, usually we do not even acknowledge it is fear that drives us to do it. Instead we frame it as we "need" things. If we "need" something, it cannot be bad, it is a basic human survival trait is it not? to seek what we need. It is required for a happy life, and what does anyone want but happiness? Yes. But, if we really take a look at what we tell ourselves we "need" we quickly realize we don't need any of it. Well, most of it. In fact is is only fear that dictates we do.

I need to be popular: fear of being alone, fear of not being accepted, fear of not fitting in, fear of being different, fear of standing out, fear of not being loved.

I need a new car, not one that gets me where I need to go but one that looks good and requires more than I can afford to purchase: Fear of not being cool, fear of no longer being the best, fear of not looking manly enough, fear of being thought of as less, fear of not being able to buy whatever one wants, fear of others' opinion.

I need to get good grades: fear of being rejected by one's parents, fear of being rejected by one's friends, fear of not being smart enough, fear of not getting money in the future, fear of inadequacy, fear of not being loved.

I need, I need, I need, I need... and finally we realize it was but fear that motivated our need when we accomplished our goal and were left unsatisfied. Instead we crave more, for our fear lives longer than we do, its life force is our denial, its food is our hunger to satisfy it, its air is what we term obsession, its excrement is our failure. It is the reason there are so many successful people who feel unsatisfied, who feel inadequate, who feel they need more.

We need to get rid of/kill/discredit/outcast those who are "immoral"/"inhuman"/"different": fear of being wrong, fear of the unknown, fear of being the same as somehting one has been taught and trained to loath, fear that one and those like one are not superior, fear of not being special.

Love drives a different sort of passion. A passion of constant contentment, or risks and equal if not greater amounts of driving force, energy, persistance, and labour intensive struggle to accomplish. Yet, it smiles and learns from misfortune, it thrives of growth, it feeds us as we feed it, it is simbiotic and not parasitic, and so we are satisfied with our successes small and large, and not driven to misery by our occasional downturns. When we reach a goal we feel satisfied and we do not hunger for more without a greater purpose. We find happiness in the small things. In the pride of one's parents, with teh realization that is is easily won, with the smile of children, with the whispers of winds, with the phone calls of dear friends, with the hugs of loved ones, with the playfulness of dogs, with the pride of cats, with the brilliance of a morning sun, with the squaking of birds, with routine and with spontinaity, with the blessing of life each day. It is a different passion that drives love and is driven by it. And it is the only weapon against fear, corny and sappy as it may be. Sadly, it is usually the rarest of individuals who has experienced real love, for we build walls to it, we hide from it, we are indifferent to it, we are sarcastic at the thought of it, it is not cool to love. It is cool to not care.

I picked the tea thing back up. I went to the "guy who knows everything and anything about tea" who is literally the teacher of almost everyone in this city, and holds their contact information even though the NGO's are closed. I just went to his house, I told him who I was, and he invited me in and we had a long chat. I have an interview tomorrow and he will tell me who else to contact. As I only need a total of 4 or 5 hour long interviews to make this work I am more relaxed.
I will probably still pick another topic and head into KPG and do it too. But that will be extra plan B. Always have a plan B, if plan A fails you are good, if plan A does not fail you are extraordinary.

I purchased a Lord Ganesha out of Yak bone for about 7 dollars and placed him in the center of the room.

I trust the the elephant headed god shall ride his rat and remove my obstacles.